women issues

My dilemma with becoming a mother {Women Stuff}

Swathy · October 30, 2012 · 13 Comments

Hey, Nidhi. I am Punam and read your comment on becoming mother dilemma so thought of sharing my experience. To be a mother is always a huge responsibility and even I had loads of confusion when I was about to be a mother.

In my situation, it was all our decision to have a baby and others saying its too early because we had been married for only a year and half!! I was afraid of the responsibilities and wanted to learn how to run and take care of home before I became a mom.

Those days, even though ours was a love marriage, we used to have enough heated discussions to make me reluctant to go for a baby. I always used to think that excess of arguments between me and my husband means there is less understanding and that’s not good for the baby.

In a nut shell, I wanted to have a few years for ourselves to understand each other before we expanded the family. But, then, the question came to whether the disagreements would ever end? I mean howsoever much you might love or understand a person, everyone has their own opinion.

Me and my mom also fight till date even though we have a 27 year old relationship not considering her being my mom fact!! First Advantage: Our relationship and understanding improved with the baby. Second Advantage: Kids become THE ultimate excuse

I always used to have this complaint that I will have no time for myself after having a baby. But, the truth is I have more time myself now as I have everybody to help me and they give me my own space. I have more servants now to help me because they think I have more work.

If you tend to be a little on the late side for social events and really hate having to iron, guess what? You have a built-in excuse for tardiness, slovenly dressing, and a whole host of other things. “Sorry, but with the baby and all, it’s practically impossible to [fill in the blank].” Hell, you’ll even get to leave boring parties early! 😀

So, these are a few things which I found changed after having my little angel 🙂 Hope, this helps you. I do have few other things to mention in another post. So, watch out for that. And, in the meanwhile, you can always visit my own blog. I recently did an EOTD and a post on bumps after waxing!!

Other posts from Punam:

Hair Care during and after Pregnancy
Lakme Perfect Radiance Intense Whitening Capsules Treatment

Should I go for a baby or not? {Women Stuff}

Swathy · October 14, 2012 · 30 Comments

The reason why I am writing this post is because of a comment by one of the readers Nidhi. She wrote this –

hi Swati
i do not know whether my comment(question) would be apt here or not..but i would like to know ..is becoming a mother a good thing ?
i mean..i feel scared with all the responsibilities,pain,stretch marks,no time for self..and the list goes on.
my family is pressurising me and i do not know what is right ?
i love kids..may be am just scared of the responsibilities..but i want to know what good things happen after you become a mother (so that i can convince myself 🙂

First of all, any question or doubt you might have you can always speak of it so feel free to comment 🙂 And, yes, thank you for putting up such a major issue. In fact, one of my colleagues is also going through the same phase.

She has been married for three years and now, the pressure from both sides of her family is impossible for hear to bear, in fact so much that she thinks it better to get a baby and relieved of the burden. But, the real wish was known when she suddenly started having her periods after a long spell and she shared with me how relieved she felt after that. Clearly, she is not mentally ready for it.

Now, to answer your question, I would ask another question. Do you think you are afraid of the responsibilities which come up with motherhood? Or, is it that you think its too soon and you would like to spend more time with your husband?

If its the first, the answer is obvious that you will never be “READY” for it. So, go ahead, plan a baby and with time, you will feel you have made the right decision. It will also help you to know many women do that and they never regret their decision 🙂

Now, the second alternative is a bit more complicated. It depends on how well you know your husband, how much of a relationship you share, how long you have been married, what were your aspirations and expectations with regards to your marriage.

Essentially, if you have been married just for a year or your age is around 25 or less (not that I mean you should be pregnant if you hit 26!) or are a person who likes to take her own time to do everything in life, I would say wait for the right moment. In these cases, the intuition or the gut instinct of a person really helps. If you are that kinds, I would say it might do you good to wait.

So, Nidhi, the answer is that go to a gynaecologist and take a proper session with her about motherhood – the physical changes it demands from you, talk with your friends who might have kids (if you are first, I know how tough is that decision), talk to your husband, discuss all your fears and everything with him, know his mind and what he wants.

Take time to decide but first know your own mind as to exactly what you want because ultimately its you who is going to bear the baby. I have also asked Punam to write something about it and incidentally she has the same story like yours so probably, you might be able to relate to her. The post should be coming in some days 🙂

And, to all your mothers and married ladies, what do you think about the most important decision in your life? Don’t forget to comment and help out Nidhi 🙂

Other Women Issues:
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Heart and Cardiovascular Diseases in Women?

Heart and Cardiovascular Diseases in Women? {Women Stuff}

Swathy · September 28, 2012 · 2 Comments

Today is World’s Heart Day. So, I am borrowing this article from The Hindu Magazine, September 23, 2012. They had published a small article on how to take care of the heart. I shall try not to infringe on the copyright and am again asserting that this post may end up being a copy of the article. So, the entire credit for the post goes to the Hindu newspaper.

Symptoms of CVD in women

feeling of discomfort between breasts or behind breastbone

pain radiating over arms, back, neck, jaw or stomach

shortness of breath, weakness or fatigue

unusual anxiety or nervousness

indigestion or nausea

sudden sweating, dizziness and collapse

Cardiovascular diseases are getting more prominent in women. Its no longer a man’s disease!!!Its especially dangerous if you smoke, drink or lead a sedentary life or have high blood pressure or sugar or cholesterol levels or are under huge amount of stress due to personal and professional problems.

In fact, even children are at risk from the condition called Cogenital Heart Defect. The improper development of heart during the pregnancy can result in this. Mothers who do not take care of themselves or their diet during pregnancy have a high risk of having children with this defect. Also, if you are a diabetic, your child is prone to heart-related problems.

How to Prevent?

Be physically active!!! Walk or exercise daily.

Avoid salt, sugar and fatty foods. Eat lots of fruits and vegetables.

Maintain a healthy weight.

Quit smoking and avoid respiratory irritants.

Limit or stop alcohol.

If you have lung problem, get influenza vaccination annually.

The reason for these heart diseases are mainly the fatty deposits on the walls of the arteries. Interestingly, these deposits may occur on both the inner walls as well as the outer walls. And, in fact, there is absolutely no cure to remove the deposits on the Outer walls of the arteries so that makes weight management and diet a very important consideration in life.

If the arteries are blocked even partially due to these deposits, the blood flow is not smooth to the heart and heart may fall short of adequate oxygen and other nutrients needed to function properly. When this blockage gets severe, it can result in heart attack. Women of 50-52 are at more risk and especially if there has been a family history of coronary diseases.

So, how do you take care of your heart?
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